"You're gonna miss me when I'm gone"

https://www.ted.com/talks/carmen_agra_deedy_spins_stories#t-741867

Once upon a time, my mother…..

By Carmen Agra Deedy

       The Ted talk that I decided to analyze is called “Once upon a time, my mother…” by Carmen Agra Deedy. In this hilarious, yet heart-warming Ted talk, she starts off the talk by talking about and introducing her parents. She tells the audience that she and her parents are Cuban and her parents live in Florida. Deedy goes on to say her mother is very slow and funny, but is very kind and caring, and that her father has an old, blunt soul, but is very easy to talk to. Deedy continues into the topic of stories, and how “ Every one of us just once, just once, would like the chance to share our story. To tell our story”. Deedy then begins to tell the story titled “You’re going to miss me when I'm gone”. She tells us how one day she went to visit her mother after a call she received from her. She arrived at the house and finds her mother standing on the front porch jingling a pair of keys. Deedy was confused, but then that curiosity turned into what she called a “catastrophe” as her mother pulled out a driver’s license. Deedy informed us that not only was her mother almost senile, but way too old to be driving. Her mother called her over that day to go with her to the mall to find some undergarments for Deedy’s father, but what Deedy’s mother regretted to inform her that her mother was going to be the one driving.They get into the car, with her mother sitting on two books, and venture their way into what would become one of Deedy’s most  dangerous, adventurous and unforgettable experiences of her life.

As they are on their way to the mall, Deedy asks her mother if she had been stopped recently. With that question, her mother answers with a “No!” Deedy asks her again and she replies with “I haven’t gotten a ticket!” Deedy begins to laugh and pushes her mom to explain. Her mother explains how she was stopped by a Cuban man who spoke spanish and would not be outwitted by Deedy’s mother’s “Cuban charms and good looks”. Her mother then says “That was it. It was done!” Deedy goes onto ask what was done and was shocked to find out that the situation with her mother was “done” because the “light turned green” and she drove off! This just adds to the amount of stress weighing upon Deedy as they arrive to the mall in a hurried yet frightful journey.

When they arrive to the mall, Deedy’s mother is frantically searching for a parking spot. Deedy, knowing that it was a Saturday and during the Holidays, knew that today, she was in for a ride to remember. Deedy’s mother then finds a parking spot about three isles down in the parking lot. She then asks Deedy to get out the car and stand in the parking space so that no one takes it. When Deedy refuses to obey her mother’s orders, her mother gets out the car, with a phone book in hand, and waddles all the way to the parking space, leaving Deedy in the passenger seat. People are honking, words are being thrown towards Deedy and she is dumbfounded by the amount of chaos happening before her eyes. Just when she thought things couldn't have been worse, she notices her mother using her phone book to push a car in reverse pulling into the parking space that her mother had “claimed”. Deedy then rushes out the car and begins to frantically yell at her mom to get back in the car and find another parking space. Her mother refuses. As the two are going back and forth, a pair of siblings come up to Deedy and begins to laugh and ask “Is this your mother?” Deedy sarcastically confirms and is then explained by the siblings that “your mother reminds us of our mother!” Deedy wonders why the two felt as though they needed to tell her that at that moment in time, but it hit her when the two siblings replied, “Man we miss her” and walk away. Deedy then turns to her mother and says “ma”, in which her mother replies “See baby? You're going to miss me when I’m gone”. Deedy closes her story and the Ted talk comes to an end.

In this Ted talk, Carmen Deedy’s purpose was definitely to evoke emotion within the audience, but to also “share her story”, which, in her argument, is one of everyone’s goals in life. Deedy really hits home with the element of Pathos in her Ted talk. She conveys this sense of emotion within her Ted talk by allowing the audience to feel what she del during the time in which her story became a story. This may not have been “her” story, but it was a story that meant a lot to her. In the beginning of the talk, she claims that everyone has a story they want to share, whether it is their story, or someone close to them, but everyone has a story to share. She uses descriptions to the point she is almost painting a picture before you. Whenever she would reference her mother, she would smile, or let the audience know with facial expressions that no matter how much her mother gets on her nerves or drives her crazy, she still loves her the same. The last part of her story, personally, made me tear up. When she she describes the two siblings coming up to her saying how much they missed her mother, which in return made Deedy appreciate her mother more and how much she’ll miss her when she is gone (and her mother made sure she knew it), made me also appreciate my mother, and even my father, just a little bit more. I picked this Ted talk because I thought it might be funny, and since it was talking about mothers, I thought it would be something I could relate to as well with my mother. I didn’t realize how much this Ted talk related to me until she began to tell her story. Now of course, my mother can drive and isn’t old yet, but the aspects and little details of Deedy’s mother made me really draw a connection between her mother and mine. As she was going through her story, she made me remember all the times my mom drove me crazy and tried new things just for the fun of it. She made me realize that life is too short not to enjoy the little things in life, especially the crazy and adventurous was. But above all, she made me appreciate my mother more, despite the many times she got on my nerves. I think that Carmen Deedy’s argument is very true, and can apply to almost anyone. I would honestly recommend this Ted talk to anyone who is in for a good laugh, a good smile, or a wake up call to help them realize how much they should appreciate their parents, or the ones they look up to as them.